Saturday, 27 September 2014

Stalker in Paradise by Francine Howarth

AMAZON UK
AMAZON US
With regret, this book disappointed me for many reasons. Let me start with some quotes from the book:

‘Ahoy, their Daddy, how’s the birthday boy?’ (Ahoy there, Daddy, how’s the birthday boy?)

‘Oh, and Ricky, see to it your back on set by one on the dot.’ (you’re)

‘The fisherman are hauling their boats right up the beach’ (fishermen) 

‘Whilst walking down the winding path er thoughts kept turning full circle’ (her) 

'Yee Gods' (Ye) 

'Clothes-hangar' (Someone must have a lot of clothes to fill a hangar…clothes hanger.) 

'Gratis a quickie divorce' (Check you know your Latin before using it. Gratis means ‘free’ not 'thanks to') 

And these are only a drop in the very large ocean of errors in this book. I’m wondering whether this book should have been titled ‘Stalker in Paradise—Draft Edition’. I’ll quote the Amazon book blurb, because I’ve already spent too long on this book.

“Actor and Hollywood golden boy, Ricky Lindon, loved Tara Portland with all his heart and lost her through no fault of his own. On seeing her again he’s determined to do whatever it takes to get her back. But fate intervenes in a way that rocks the very foundations of his movie star lifestyle. Not only is Tara surrounded by bodyguards, the new man in her life is a force to be reckoned with, and a disastrous incident turns Ricky from one-time lover to secret stalker. But is the thrill of watching her as she sleeps enough, or will compulsion to touch be his downfall?" 

Unfortunately, it wasn’t well written, the characters were cardboard and one-dimensional, not credible or even likeable. The dialogue was wooden and unnatural, and there was an odd choice of words for a modern chick lit—who uses in a thrice or betwixt or visage these days? 

Why did I finish it? Because I always finish a book, and more often than not I have been rewarded for my determination. I hoped…desperately…that this would be the case in this book, but sadly it just didn’t happen. 

I always try to find something good to say about a book, however bad, but this one has me truly stumped, and all I can do is commend the author for making an effort. 

Sorry, it's a thumbs down for this book.

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